http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAIib-xC5IQ&feature=related

DISCUSS!!!

I'd rather be tailgating

I'd really rather be painting a cooler or tailgating right now, napping, shopping, crafting or doing really anything else. Alas every once in a while you need to take a trip to the test library and brush up on some class work. For those of you currently also procrastinating on your adorable little Macbook Pro's, here is some Thursday afternoon reading:

Hilarious Haters:
Mason-Dixon War- Sorority Style (Sorostitutes love both South and Northern Sisters xo)
Sorority Girl Problems

Darlings:

Caffeine and Cocktails's mention of us:

You SHOULD coordinate your clothes. You SHOULD make him work for it. You SHOULD make sure that you have a "mom" in your group of friends. You SHOULD NEVER cry whilst drunk.

In Defense of Sorostitutes
Sorority Manifesto- Excerpt:

I am a nice girl. I am the kind of girl you hope you will bring home to Thanksgiving dinner. I care about the elementary education of third world countries, I care about the op-ed in the Sunday New York Times, and my main goal in life is to have an engagement ring bigger than that of any girl I knew in high school.

xoxoxoxo Slampiece

 PS: you already read our loves over at Status Bro's, TFM (or as we like to call it, TSM), and  lax bro's, right? Well, get on that.

PPS: If you are anybody (and even if you are nobody), you should be on twitter. Go visit our Twitter to get hilarious and true Sorostitute Stories in 140 characters or less! 

American Sweethearts

As you know, today is an important election day. As Americans, it is our right and duty to vote for the middle-age upper-class white males that our daddies tell us to vote for, for the sake of our taxes and our rights, of course. Okay, I kid...

In all seriousness, however, it is also important to remind our lovely Sorostitutes that being an American Sweetheart is what we are born and raised to do. NOBODY bakes a peach cobbler as tasty, drives a truck on the ranch as adorably, wears cowgirl hat and boots as precisely, lavishes in Lilly Pulitzer as obsessively, and drives the boys as crazy as WE do. Sorostitutes are the epitome and paradigm of American girls.

Yes, being a Sorostitute means being debaucherous and outrageous, but it also means living up to the ideals of the fraternity and being your absolute best, carrying yourself with the dignity and grace that women before you saw in yourself enough to extend you a bid. We may be "Greek" on the outside, but these values are inherently American.

Ladies and gents, be sure to go out and vote today, and put into actions these values. Besides, you really don't want those GDIs to rule the polls do you? ;)

xoxo

Insight for every sorostitute who finds herself below the Mason Dixon Line

Here’s a few pointers for any sorostitute who finds herself below the Mason Dixon Line and feeling out of place.

Sweet Tea- drink it, own it, love it. If you are below the Mason Dixon Line, you must drink sweet tea. If you don’t like it, order half sweet/half unsweet and blame it on the calories.

Chick fil a- it aint real if its in the north. It used to be a jewel in the south but the north has stolen it, so now the only true chicken and biscuits in the south come from Bojangles.

Cowboy boots- they match everything. Don’t ask me if it’s acceptable to wear them with that sundress because the answer is always yes.

Lilly dresses- get one, it will go perfectly on daddy’s amex. There are plenty of fakes out there so take your pick but it better be good because I (and every other good southern belle) can spot a bad fake Lilly from a mile away.

Jack Rogers- this is a staple in every southern sorostitutes wardrobe. Jack Rogers look good on everyone, with every outfit, and next to every frat daddy’s Sperrys. Its hard to find fakes so good luck, but if you do, more power to you (and feel free to share the knowledge with the rest of us).

Rainbows- when you are hung over the next morning and you go to put on your nike running shorts and your TKE toga party tshirt, every southern belle must have her go to rainbows to slip on her perfectly tanned and manicured feet.

Accents- own it. If you have a southern accent, take it as God’s blessing, but if you don’t then please don’t give me a headache with your sad attempt to cover up your Midwestern slurs.

Vineyard Vines- every southern belle needs an embroidered whale. www.vineyardvines.com work on it.

College football- a proper southern belle has an entire closet designated only for her tailgating attire in the colors of her school. dresses, skirts, and tops. Tailgates are a fashion show for all the southern sorostitutes to show off their fashion knowledge and school support, often sporting a pin with their sorority on it. If you are truly a southern belle, you will NEVER repeat a tailgate outfit, and save the jeans and tshirts for basketball season.

Monograms- how many things to you have monogrammed? Your towels, your koozies, your drink ware, your longchamp and your vineyard vines tote? Get to work because if you questioned any of the previously mentioned items you have a lot of monogramming to do.

Koozies- keep at least two koozies in your bag at all times. No one likes a warm beer (sorry functional alcoholic, it’s the south and tailgates don’t come with wine and cocktails). So update your koozie collection with koozies containing fraternity letters, your sorority symbol (don’t drink in your letters, its tacky), your initials (monograms duh), and all things classy.

Also, clean your mouth out with soap. No southern fratty wants to hear a southern belle hollering dirty words. Be polite, put on a smile (whiten your teeth first), and always stay classy.